List of films: J–K
Seems a computer engineer, a systems analyst, and a programmer were driving down a mountain when the brakes gave out. They screamed down the mountain, gaining speed, but finally managed to grind to a halt, more by luck than anything else, just inches from a thousand foot drop to jagged rocks.
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They all got out of the car: The computer engineer said, "I think I can fix it. We are all worms. But I do believe I am a glowworm. NSFW: Brigands will demand your money or your life, but a woman will demand both. Yesterday upon the stair I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today -- I think he's from the CIA. If you wish to be happy for one hour, get drunk. If you wish to be happy for three days, get married. If you wish to be happy for a month, kill your pig and eat it. If you wish to be happy forever, learn to fish. On a tous un peu peur de l'amour, mais on a surtout peur de souffrir ou de faire souffrir. A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. NSFW: You can have a dog as a friend. You can have whiskey as a friend. But if you have a woman as a friend, you're going to wind up drunk and kissing your dog.
Early to bed and early to rise and you'll be groggy when everyone else is wide awake. Remember thee Aye, thou poor ghost while memory holds a seat In this distracted globe. Remember thee! Yea, from the table of my memory I'll wipe away all trivial fond records, All saws of books, all forms, all pressures past, That youth and observation copied there. If scientific reasoning were limited to the logical processes of arithmetic, we should not get very far in our understanding of the physical world.
One might as well attempt to grasp the game of poker entirely by the use of the mathematics of probability. Laws of Computer Programming: 1 Any given program, when running, is obsolete.
Let me put it this way: today is going to be a learning experience. Live in a world of your own, but always welcome visitors. It is explained that all relationships require a little give and take. This is untrue. Any partnership demands that we give and give and give and at the last, as we flop into our graves exhausted, we are told that we didn't give enough. That is the true season of love, when we believe that we alone can love, that no one could have loved so before us, and that no one will love in the same way as us.
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To teach is to learn twice. And there aren't even any property taxes. MacKay, Mathematics b. Marriage is a lot like the army, everyone complains, but you'd be surprised at the large number that re-enlist. I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. Members will grep each other by the hand after intro , yacc a lot, smoke filtered chroots in pipes, chown with forks, use the wc unless uuclean , fseek nice zombie processes, strip, and sleep, but not, we hope, od. Three days will be devoted to discussion of the ramifications of whodo.
Two seconds have been allotted for a complete rundown of all the user- friendly features of Unix. No Reader Service No. Dobb's Journal, June ' QOTD: "This is a one line proof Religion is the best defense against a religious experience. Jung, psychiatrist Goldenstern's Rules: 1 Always hire a rich attorney 2 Never buy from a rich salesman.
Succumb to natural tendencies. Be hateful and boring. It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years. If puns were deli meat, this would be the wurst. The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own. Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
There once was a man who went to a computer trade show. Each day as he entered, the man told the guard at the door: "I am a great thief, renowned for my feats of shoplifting. Be forewarned, for this trade show shall not escape unplundered. But the man merely wandered from booth to booth, humming quietly to himself.
When the man left, the guard took him aside and searched his clothes, but nothing was to be found. On the next day of the trade show, the man returned and chided the guard saying: "I escaped with a vast booty yesterday, but today will be even better. On the final day of the trade show, the guard could restrain his curiosity no longer. Please enlighten me. What is it that you are stealing? If you don't know what game you're playing, don't ask what the score is.
Prison Vs. Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. The garden is in mourning; The rain falls cool among the flowers. Summer shivers quietly On its way towards its end. Golden leaf after leaf Falls from the tall acacia. Summer smiles, astonished, feeble, In this dying dream of a garden.
For a long while, yet, in the roses, She will linger on, yearning for peace, And slowly Close her weary eyes. I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know. No man is an Iland, intire of it selfe; every man is a peece of the Continent, a part of the maine; if a Clod bee washed away by the Sea, Europe is the lesse, as well as if a Promontorie were, as well as if a Mannor of thy friends or of thine owne were; any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankinde; And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; It tolls for thee.
Suchness is neither that which is existence, nor that which is nonexistence, nor that which is at once existence and nonexistence, nor that which is not at once existence and nonexistence. Did it ever occur to you that fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?tax-marusa.com/order/relamid/golocaliser-tlphone-orange.php
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Or that we drive on parkways and park on driveways? You have taken yourself too seriously. Only two kinds of witnesses exist. The first live in a neighborhood where a crime has been committed and in no circumstances have ever seen anything or even heard a shot. The second category are the neighbors of anyone who happens to be accused of the crime. These have always looked out of their windows when the shot was fired, and have noticed the accused person standing peacefully on his balcony a few yards away.
My friends, I am here to tell you of the wonderous continent known as Africa. Well we left New York drunk and early on the morning of February We were 15 days on the water, and 3 on the boat when we finally arrived in Africa. Upon our arrival we immediately set up a rigorous schedule: Up at , breakfast, and back in bed by Pretty soon we were back in bed by Now Africa is full of big game.
The first day I shot two bucks. That was the biggest game we had. Africa is primerally inhabited by Elks, Moose and Knights of Pithiests. The elks live up in the mountains and come down once a year for their annual conventions.
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And you should see them gathered around the water hole, which they leave immediately when they discover it's full of water. They weren't looking for a water hole. They were looking for an alck hole. One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas, how he got in my pajamas, I don't know. Then we tried to remove the tusks.
That's a tough word to say, tusks. As I said we tried to remove the tusks, but they were imbedded so firmly we couldn't get them out. But in Alabama the Tuscaloosa, but that is totally irrelephant to what I was saying. We took some pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed.
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So we're going back in a few years Marx [Groucho]. If you wish women to love you, be original; I know a man who wore fur boots summer and winter, and women fell in love with him. In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present. NSFW: "Life sucks, but death doesn't put out at all To be, or not to be: that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them?
To die: to sleep; No more; and by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish'd.